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Rhythm with Others

November 16, 2014 Speaker: Dan Davis Series: Rhythm

Topic: Sunday Message Verse: Matthew 22:34–22:40

Matthew 22:34-40 NIV

Hearing that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, the Pharisees got together. One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."

Rhythm With Others

Living in rhythm with others is part of the greatest commandment to love God with everything you’ve got and to love the people around you with the same kind of care you have for yourself.

Loving Different Kinds of People

While the rule of love should permeate every relationship and interaction we have, our love shouldn't be a “one size fits all, treat everyone the exact same way” kind of love. How we love is going to be different depending on the relationship and the kind of person we’re dealing with.

(1) Fillers

A filler is an encourager. A filler is someone in your life, who after you meet with them, you feel renewed, refreshed, recharged. They fill your tank. We need to proactively prioritize filling relationships. If we don't have any, we just need to take a next step and be patient. If we're married, our main filler shouldn't be someone of the opposite sex other than our spouse. Finally, filling relationship are mutually refreshing over time, though in some seasons we give more, while in other seasons we receive more.

Philemon 1:7 NIV

Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord's people.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 NIV

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

Proverbs 11:25 NIV

A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.

(2) Drainers

A drainer is a one-way relationship where the effect on us is on-going frustration and unending fatigue. Drainers are self-centered. They don't listen well. They're not very teachable. They mostly talk about themselves and rarely ask about you. Draining people need love and there's an unseen story of hurt that helps explain why they are the way they are. Still, we need to think about how we love drainers and be aware of their effect on our lives. We should do what we can for them, but it's not up to us. There's a difference between "ministering to" and "rescuing from." Sometimes with a draining person, we might need to move on.

(3) Interrupters

An interrupter is someone God brings into our life that we weren’t expecting. They weren’t anywhere on our schedule and they weren’t part of our world. While it's wise to make plans, we need to have room in our lives for interrupters. The parable of the Good Samaritan in Luke 10 is a good example. So we need to be open and make room for interrupters. Yet we also need to know ourselves and respond accordingly. Those of us who are highly planned, need to bend more. Those of us who go with the flow can't let every interruption dictate the rhythm of our lives. We need the Holy Spirit to show us who and when and how to respond to interruptions.

(4) Opposers

An opposer is someone who’s against you. They dislike you. They ignore you. They lie about you. They want to see you fail. They talk about you behind your back. And they may even try to harm you in some way. The Bible calls them your enemy. A drainer might have a negative effect on us, but their intentions are good. They’re not out to get us. Not so with an opposer. Still Jesus commands us to love opposers and pray for them. As hurt as we may be, we need to leave any revenge to God. While we are called to forgive those who hurt us, rebuilding trust with them isn't necessarily a given. If our opposer is an abuser, we need to get help and get away.

Matthew 5:43-47 NIV

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?

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